The days merged into one and the inward battle of love and pain flowed through me – fleeting feelings of being alone and feeling like I had the world at my feet.
I chatted daily to my best friend daily and she kept me afloat, I sensed she had something to tell me but was worried because I was so vulnerable but I guessed and took the words out of her mouth for her
‘You’re going aren’t you’
I knew it was coming, it was on the cards. She was moving to Australia and I was so utterly happy for her, and almost felt a release because I knew that this was the best thing for her – 18 moths after her attack she was still so fragile – she needed to leave the city and she needed to heal. (But I was so desperately sad for myself)
A week after the attack we went to Ireland, annoyingly I was unable to do all the water sports, unable to play in the sea with the kids and do all the things I was so excited about. I couldn’t even walk far on the beach because the pain was still so dominating – but just being with friends in the sun by the sea was an amazing healer.
I cannot tell you or really explain, but I began to see and feel a real spiritual connection. Something was telling me ‘ this is all happening for a reason’
To be continued..